Covert Blogging from Rm 305

Hello all,
This is Jacob Mercer and yesterday, John "Macadocious" Yoho asked me to complete a blog about my experiences at this year's CityReach in Washington, PA. First of all, i would like to denounce the boastful attitudes of all Steeler and Penguin fans. Yesterday, I simply stated that I myself was a fan of the Washington Capitals, and I was struck in the arm by a woman (who was surprisingly burly). Might i say that that sign of physical abuse still smarts to this very moment, both physically and emotionally. I was apologized to countless times for numerous destructions of Washington sports teams brought on by Steely McBean and Sid the Kid. I could take solace in one thing, though; my Baltimore Orioles, as terrible as they may be, will never be as bad as the Pittsburgh Pirates. Go O's!
Anyways, i am attending the car wash ministry once again and i am proud to announce that I am being considered a veteran, just like my papa. i think they should also award me a Purple Heart for the massive amount of sunburn acquired directly on top of my feet and that blow dealt out by that raucous Penguins super-fan. I am just about to head out to the second day of the labor camp known as car wash. To all those who denounce car wash as an easy way out; how 'bout you try washing huge F-150's for eight hours a day in the scolding sun as the heat from a running engine burns the flesh and hope out of your body. The only thing that keeps me going is the appreciatory smiles and gestures of gratitude dealt out by the wonderful people of Washington and Canonsburg. God bless Aaron Johnson, his wife, and the people serving at Lifepoint, because without them, none of this would be Popsicle (im a slave to catchy Popsicle commercials). Peace and love to my people in MD, i miss the silence of non-Arkansas/Texas/Joseph Witcher people.
In the words of the late, great Biggie Smalls;
"Peace to my hooligans in Brooklyn"
-Jacob L. Mercer